Loneliness and Aloneness - The Traveller WithinSw. Dhyan UpageyaToday, someone can feel connected as long as our screen is on. A message arrives, a familiar face appears, a voice comes. Then the screen goes blank, the person other side is gone and we are left with our FOMO, the new name of Loneliness. The virtual world is taking over the real word and the connection with real people becoming even more complexed. The new generation of course need a new ways how to handle it.Perhaps we have grown so accustomed to being reachable virtually that being alone feels like being forgotten.After a day full of conversations, group chats and calls, we can still feel strangely lonely. There was plenty of company, yet something in us remained unheard. On another day, an afternoon spent reading or watching the light change can feel deeply satisfying. Aloneness is connecting to our soul.What makes the difference? When does being alone hurt, and when does it feel like coming home?The old song “Musafir hoon yaaron na ghar hai na thikana bus chalte jana hai bus chalte jana” ( I am a traveller without house or destination, I have to keep moving and moving ) comes to mind. There is comfort in its acceptance of life as a journey. We keep moving, even when we don’t know where the road will lead but our soul is leading the path.Somewhere amid the attachments we create in the journey, there is a relationship we often neglect: the one we have with ourselves.I remember visiting the great poet Firaq Gorakhpuri at his home in Allahabad. In the large lawn, he had made a little hermitage. Wrapped in a blanket, surrounded by books and enormous registers, he continued writing his last poems.“Kaise hain aap?” I asked.He smiled. “Apne se fursat hi nahi milti, masrufiyat inteha hai.” (I scarcely get any time away from myself; I am so completely occupied.)That reply has stayed with me. There was humour in it, and such ease with his own company. His thoughts, memories and poetry gave him much to be with.Osho’s distinction between loneliness and aloneness points towards this: the ache of someone’s absence, and the discovery of one’s own presence.For younger people growing up online, this question can feel especially immediate. You can belong to five group chats and have nobody you feel comfortable calling when you are upset. You can watch the views on your story rise and still wonder whether anyone really sees you.Learning to be with ourselves takes patience. In the quiet, an old regret or a worry about tomorrow may surface. Before we even recognise the feeling, we reach for our phone.Perhaps we can begin with something small. Drink tea without checking messages. Take a short walk without making a call. Let a thought pass without rushing to distract ourselves. Become aware of touch and feel the fragrance of the flower in the garden.We will still need people, and we will still miss them. But we may become less frightened of their temporary or permanent absence, more able to enjoy companionship without constantly seeking reassurance.We are fellow travellers. While our paths meet, let us share the conversation, the meal, the laughter.And when we walk alone for a while, perhaps we can notice our own footsteps.The screen may go blank. We are still here.About Swami Dhyan UpageyaSwami Dhyan Upageya, wordly known as Jwalant Swaroop founder and CEO of Happyho.in is an emotional and mental resilience advisory based in NOIDA.&nbsp;<a href="mailto:jwalant@happyho.in/9811237999">jwalant@happyho.in/9811237999</a>