The Wild Geese & Water 14

Fourteenth Discourse from the series of 14 discourses - The Wild Geese & Water by Osho.
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The first question:
The Dutch television has asked me to participate in a program. One of the questions on which they want me to speak is as follows: what is lacking in the Christian churches that is attracting so many young people to the new religious movements?
Deva Ojas, Christ is missing.
The Christian churches are there but they are just containers without the content, utterly empty, a lamp whose light has gone out long before, a cage – perhaps a golden cage – but the bird has flown and it sings no longer.
If Christ is missing, it is bound to attract new people into new adventures. It is always the young ones who find the real masters. The old ones settle with the establishment, such are their vested interests. And if once in a while an old person gets into an inquiry for the truth – even though it goes against his tradition, convention, belief – then that old man is old only physically; psychologically, spiritually he is young.
Ojas, remind your people back in Holland: Who were the people who were attracted toward Jesus himself? Were they old? Were they young? And what was missing in the Jewish religion? Why were they attracted to Christ?
They were all young people; Jesus himself was very young. He died when he was only thirty-three and the people who had come to him were almost of his age. What was the reason? Begin your answer from there, from why they left the Jewish church. It has a long tradition from Abraham, Moses, Ezekiel, so many prophets; a beautiful scripture, the Old Testament, a great system of theology and philosophy. Why did they leave all that behind and follow this uneducated carpenter’s son. What was the reason?
The reason was that he had attained the ultimate in consciousness; he had become a christ. Remember, christ has nothing to do with Jesus as such. Jesus is the individual and the phenomenon of christ consciousness is universal. It has happened to many people before Jesus and to many people after Jesus; Jesus is only one of the christs.
Buddha is a christ, Zarathustra is a christ, Lao Tzu is a christ and there have been many, many christs after Jesus. Bodhidharma, Lin Chi, Kabir, Nanak – the long, long river of christ consciousness continues. And the young, the fresh, will always be seeking the christ, the christ consciousness. So wherever the young people find the taste of living christ consciousness, they are bound to go there. They are going to risk everything.
In the Christian churches everything is there, only the bridegroom is missing. All the guests are there, the celebration is perfectly ready to start but the bridegroom is missing. So, only the old who have become almost blind – blind because of their conditioning – will not be able to see that this whole thing is just false, pseudo. Now instead of Christ they will find the Polack pope, who is just making stupid gestures.
Just the other day he landed in a small country which is forcibly occupied by the Americans. The American government had made every arrangement, security arrangement, for him. A car had been flown from America to take him from the airport to his residence – just six kilometers, and highly guarded security arrangements were made for him. He descended from the airplane, a special airplane that was only caring for him – a big jetliner carrying just one Polack!
And he talked about the dignity of the poor. He descended from the airplane and kissed the earth – these are empty gestures – and he said, “I love your country so much that I kiss its very earth.” But he didn’t talk about freedom. He loves the country so much, then why didn’t he talk about the freedom of the people? Why didn’t he say something against the people who are ruling the country forcibly? Who are occupying it? Who have made it a military base?
He didn’t talk about freedom. He talked about the beautiful country but he didn’t talk about the ugly imperialism. He was not received by any representative of the country – he was received by a special agent of the American president who had come just before him to receive him on behalf of Ronald Reagan.
And he kissed the earth. That he goes on doing everywhere, kissing the earth – impotent gestures. Talking about the dignity of the poor, and living in richness. These hypocrites are the people who have to be avoided – and the young can see.
I talk about the dignity of being rich. There is no dignity in being poor because if there is dignity in being poor, then there is dignity in being a slave too, then there is dignity in being sick too, then there is dignity in being starved too, undernourished too. These are all part of poverty.
I talk about the dignity of the rich. One should be both rich on the outside and on the inside. There is no need to divide the outside and the inside – they are all one. And one should live as richly as possible. That shows intelligence. Why talk about the dignity of the poor? Why not destroy poverty? Why console poor people? Why tell them, “You are the children of God, the special children of God”? If the poor are the children of God, then who are the rich? – the children of the Devil? Then it is better to belong to the Devil than to God, then let him have his poor children and their dignity. But then the Pope will be a son of the Devil because he is one of the richest people in the world.
Now, living in luxury and talking about the dignity of the poor is hypocrisy. Live the way you would like everybody to live. Live according to your own understanding, but don’t be pretenders. The young can see it, only the young can see it.
You must have come across the beautiful parable, I love it…

A very great king was visited by a cunning, clever priest. All priests are clever and cunning, otherwise they cannot be priests. Prostitutes may be innocent, but priests are never innocent. In fact, only innocent girls become prostitutes. Very cunning people become priests; it is the most cunning business.
The priest came to the king and said, “You have conquered the whole world. Now only one thing is missing, and unless you have that you will remain discontented.”
The king was surprised because actually that was the case: he was feeling discontented. Every successful man feels discontented. The failure can always hope, the successful cannot hope any more – he has succeeded. You have heard the proverb that nothing fails like failure. I say it is all wrong. I say to you: nothing fails like success. Once you have succeeded, you can see the futility of it. The riches are there, the power is there, but you are as empty as before. Or maybe now you feel your emptiness more, in contrast to the richness, to the power, to the success that you have achieved. Now it hurts even more. And there is no hope either – there is no tomorrow any more. You have achieved whatsoever is possible to achieve, so you cannot dream, you cannot fantasize.
The king was feeling discontented because he had conquered the whole world. He was very surprised, and trusted this priest, that he had some miraculous powers: “He has read my mind. I have not told anybody that I am feeling discontented. How has he come to know?”
He took him into his private chamber and said, “How did you manage to find it out? I never told anybody, not even my wife. I go on pretending that I am immensely contented and happy.”
All successful people do that. What is the point of saying it to everybody? They will simply laugh, “You are a fool!” They will say, “We told you before but you never listened.” So it is better to keep quiet.
“How did you manage to know?”
The priest said, “I can read your thoughts, and I know what is missing. If you can get the special clothes of the angels, then you will be immensely happy.” A new desire, a new hope – tomorrow again became alive.
The king said, “I am ready, but how to get clothes from heaven? What is the way?”
The priest said, “I will do everything. I know the way, I know the whole map, but it will cost you much. It is not an easy thing. For the first time in the whole history of humanity you will be getting divine clothes; you may be the first and the last. And I will have to bribe the angels, persuade somebody to steal, and then I have to fly to heaven and come back. It is a long journey and dangerous too, but for you I am ready to do it.”
The king said, “Don’t worry about the money. But remember one thing: don’t try to cheat me, otherwise death will be the only reward for you. So you can have a palace to yourself; do whatsoever you want to do, but you will be guarded, you cannot leave the palace. And whatsoever money you want, simply send a message and the money will be delivered to you.”
And the priest started asking for millions of rupees every day. But the king had enough. Within three weeks the priest informed him, “The clothes have arrived. A great celebration should be arranged; people should be informed. The whole capital should be decorated with lights, fireworks, balloons, because something absolutely extraordinary is happening.”
The king did as he was told, and the whole court was waiting in great silence. The man came with a beautiful box, a golden box. He opened the box, but before opening the box, he said to the court, “One thing I should remind you: I have been told by the angels that these clothes can only be seen by those who are born of their own fathers – no bastard can see these clothes. Remember that.”
Then he opened the box – the box was empty. The king looked in, the viziers looked in, and everybody started praising the clothes. Who wants to be called a bastard? Everybody knew that the box was empty, but when others were praising the clothes, everybody thought within his own heart, “It is better to keep absolutely mum. It seems that I am not the son of my father. Only I am not the son of my father because everybody else can see the clothes.”
And when the king saw that all the viziers and the courtiers and the queen, everybody could see the clothes, what was the point in saying, “I don’t see…”? He also started praising the clothes. There was great rejoicing, and the crafty priest told the king, “Now give your clothes one by one to me and I will give you the divine clothes.”
His coat was taken, his shirt was taken, his turban was taken. And he was handed nothing, just nothing! Just the gesture, an empty gesture. A turban was placed on his head that didn’t exist at all. He was looking silly in his own eyes. The shirt disappeared, then he was afraid… Then the pants disappeared, then he was standing just with his underpants, afraid: “Now what is this man going to do?”
And everybody was clapping and shouting with joy, “Our king has got divine clothes! How beautiful they look!”
Then the crafty priest asked for the underpants. For a moment the king hesitated, but now it was too late. Now to say, “I don’t see,” will be very illogical. Up to now you were seeing – what happened? Suddenly you are not the son of your father? He had to give – reluctantly, but he had to give. He had given his underpants also, now he was standing absolutely naked, just like a Jaina monk. And everybody was clapping and shouting with joy, and people started dancing. Everybody was trying to defeat everybody else, so it was known to everybody that “I am the son of my own father, far more than you are.” It was a great competition!
And then the crafty priest said, “Thousands of people are waiting outside the palace. The chariot is ready. Now, sir, come! A procession has to be taken. The whole capital is waiting. Many, many people have gathered from all over the place to see the divine clothes.”
Again he felt very hesitant for a moment. “But if everybody can see the clothes, then there is no fear really. Only I cannot see, but that is not the point. I already know,” he thought, “that I am naked. I know my nakedness and everybody can see clothes so there is no fear.”
He went into the chariot. Everybody, millions of people saw he was naked, but just before the chariot it was continuously announced that the clothes were divine and could be seen only by those who were born of their own fathers. So everybody was shouting, clapping, dancing – it was such a rejoicing.
Just a small child sitting on his father’s shoulders told the father, “Daddy, the king seems to be naked.”
The father said, “Shut up! When you grow up, then you will see. You are just a child, you don’t understand.”
But again and again the child said, “But father, I can see everything – only the clothes I cannot see. I can see you, I can see the naked king, the chariot, the horses, millions of people. And just for the clothes I have first to become grown up?”
And the father said, “Keep absolutely silent! You don’t understand. It takes time. One has to be adult, at least twenty-one years old – when you have the right to vote, that is the time when you start seeing the clothes. Wait!” And fearing that somebody may hear, he took the child away.

That was the only person there in the crowd who could see that the king was naked. Everybody could see, but only a child can say it as it is.
Jesus was recognized only by innocent people. The rabbis killed him. Now, the same rabbis have become popes, bishops, priests – the same rabbis. It is the same business. It was done in the name of Judaism, now it is done in the name of Christianity.
Christ is missing, Deva Ojas, that is the first thing to be remembered.
You ask me, “What is lacking in the Christian churches that is attracting so many young people to the new religious movements?” The second thing is that Christianity or Hinduism or Mohammedanism or Jainism or Buddhism are not your choice. You are born into a certain family which is accidental – then you are conditioned. It is a conditioning. The first disciples of Jesus were not born Christians, they chose it. And when one chooses out of one’s own intelligence and freedom, it is a totally different matter. When something is imposed upon you, it is nothing but an imprisonment.
Now, churches are nothing but jails. And for that matter, not only Christian churches, all churches. Only when a living master is there and his presence triggers a process of enlightenment in you, triggers a process of transformation in you, and you choose because of that process, then you are really religious. Otherwise these are all pseudo people: Christians, Hindus, Parsis, Sikhs – all pseudo.
The people who chose Nanak were a totally different people; they risked their lives. The people who went with Mohammed were real Muslims, they risked everything. Being with Mohammed was not an easy job, it was risking your life, your very head. To be a Mohammedan now is convenient, comfortable. To be a Hindu costs nothing.
In fact, before you ever become conscious you are already conditioned, your unconscious is already stuffed with all kinds of superstitions.
If the younger people are moving to new religious movements, the reason is because only the new is religious; the old is always a cult. Christianity is a cult. But it is a very strange thing: Christians call new religious movements cults, sects; just the opposite is the truth, they are religious. Anything which is very old is only a cult, a sect. When Jesus is alive there is religion. When Buddha is alive there is religion. When Buddha is gone there is only a cult left.
A cult is the corpse of a religion. A cult is only the footprints of the buddhas on the sands of time. Buddhas disappear in the timelessness, and on the sands of time the footprints are worshipped, as if those footprints are buddhas.
I say to you that religion exists only in the presence of a master. The moment the master leaves, the religion disappears. It is just like the fragrance of a roseflower. The moment the roseflower disappears, its petals start falling back to the soil; the fragrance also disappears. Religion is the fragrance of the person who has become awakened. It cannot be caught in churches. You cannot catch hold of a fragrance. Even if you keep the dead flower – as people love to keep in their Bibles, they keep roses between their Bible pages – by and by they become dry, they lose all fragrance. Those dry flowers, dead flowers, just give you a sense that once there was a flower.
Young people are always searching for something alive; that’s what youth is all about. So whosoever is young, whether physically or spiritually, will always seek a christ – wherever he can find, in whatsoever form he can find, he will find a christ. Unless he finds a christ he will not feel contented. And no church can be a substitute for a christ.
One has to choose the religion. These Christians, these Mohammedans, these Hindus, they have not chosen. It has been imposed on them. And remember, even if you choose hell on your own, then it is heaven, and if you are thrown into heaven forcibly, then it is hell. My definition of hell and heaven depends on freedom: if it is freedom, then it is heaven; if it is not freedom, then it is hell.
The churches are against the individual, and the young people are always searching for individuality. It is one of the intrinsic parts of youth, youthfulness, to search for authentic individuality. The churches belong to the collective mob psychology and they have fallen down to the mob psychology. They fulfill the expectations of the marketplace. They fulfill the expectations of the sleepy people, somnambulists. They cannot help you to be awakened.
Only a person who never fulfills your demands, who lives in his own light without caring about what the crowds say about him… Do you think Jesus in any way cared about what the crowds were saying about him? If he had cared, he would not have been crucified, he would have been given a Nobel Prize, he would have been a Nobel laureate like Mother Teresa of Kolkata.
He is crucified, and this Mother Teresa becomes a Nobel laureate. There seems to be no connection between Mother Teresa and Jesus Christ. There is certainly a connection between Jesus Christ and al-Hillaj Mansoor. There is certainly a connection between Jesus Christ and me. I can be crucified any day. The crowd is against me – the crowd has always been against the buddhas, but Mother Teresa fulfills the expectations of the crowd. Only stupid people can fulfill your expectations.
I have always been wondering because I have come across two persons, Morarji Desai and Mother Teresa. I had always been a little puzzled who is more stupid. They both seem to be greater than the other, bigger than the other. But then, finally, the Nobel Prize decided. Mother Teresa came first; Morarji Desai is second in the race. She fulfilled the mob psychology and its expectations more.
Jesus is crucified, Socrates is murdered. Many attempts were made on Buddha’s life. Mahavira was tortured in every possible way.
Young people are searching for freedom, for intelligence. Young people are searching for rebellion, for revolution, for a radical change. The church has been too heavy on their being, it is like a mountain-load. They want to throw it off, but they don’t know how to do it. Unless they come across a person who has done it, who has thrown away all the nonsense of the past – only he can help you to be unburdened.
That’s why young people, Ojas, are searching for new religious movements.
Remember, this television series in Holland is arranged by the Christians. They are becoming more and more afraid; they are becoming more and more worried. And why have they asked Ojas to come? They are going to pay him the fare and all the expenses from Pune to Amsterdam. Why? – because Ojas is an ex-priest. And they are becoming very worried. Even priests are becoming Osho sannyasins! It is too dangerous. They have to find out what the reasons are, so they can manage some way to prevent it. But you have to tell them the truth as it is, utterly naked. Hammer it on their heads!
Their effort is to find out the reason so they can prevent others from escaping. You should make every effort so that even others can escape because there are many, many nuns; many, many monks; many priests, who want to escape from the slavery, but they don’t know how to do it.
So use this opportunity. Don’t miss the opportunity. Don’t be polite – be true. Say the truth as it is. Say that the king is naked, say that Christ is no longer in the Christian churches, say, “We have found Christ somewhere else, that’s why we are going.” In fact, you are real Christians, they are bogus Christians.
But priests are certainly very cunning people…

At the airport a flustered young rabbi starting on his honeymoon absent-mindedly asked for one ticket to the Bahamas. But when his wife pointed out his error, he answered without a moment’s hesitation, “By thunder! You are right, dear. I had forgotten myself completely!”

Priests are very clever and cunning. But don’t worry about them. When you are with a living master, whatsoever they do to prevent people will help us; whatsoever they do to prevent people is going to help people to come to us.

At a dance party, a young lady had just been introduced to her partner. By way of making conversation she said, “Who is that terribly ugly man?”
“Why, that is my brother!” he exclaimed.
“Ah, you must excuse me,” said the lady in embarrassment, and added apologetically, “I really had not noticed the resemblance.”

Don’t worry. Whatsoever they will try to do will make things worse for themselves.
You go and enjoy the trip. Laugh loudly. I have been telling you so many jokes about the priests and the rabbis and the bishops and the popes. Find the juiciest ones because that is the best way to hit these people.

The rabbi: “What would you say if I asked you to marry me?”
The girl: “Nothing – I can’t talk and laugh at the same time.”

Only stupid people are going to remain in the churches. Intelligent ones are bound to escape. Stupid people have their own ideas – those ideas are idiotic, but they try to fulfill them. And they have to be forgiven. If only stupid people are left in the churches, it is good. It is good for the world, too. They will remain engaged there in their prayers, they will remain engaged listening to all kinds of crap, and the world will be saved from them. Let them become nuns and priests and monks, and that will do immense good to humanity. Let them remain closed in their monasteries; that is a beautiful way to keep them off, away, far away, because they are contagious, they can infect others too. Stupidity is like cancer. Cancer maybe is curable, but stupidity seems to be incurable…

One psychiatrist was very happily married to a surprisingly ugly woman. “I know she is terribly homely,” he explained to a friend, “and slightly cross-eyed and a bit dull. But boy, what exciting nightmares she has!”

He is not interested in the woman; he is interested in her exciting nightmares. So let them, such kinds of people, if they want to remain Christians and Hindus and Mohammedans, let them. We don’t want that kind to come here and pollute the air.

The father’s tone was severe as he said, “Young man, do you think you should be taking my daughter to nightclubs all the time?”
“Certainly not,” the boy answered, then added hopefully, “let us try to reason with her.”

You missed it!
Once you are caught by a girl, it is no longer a question of your choice where you go. The boy is right; he says, “Let us try to reason with her.”

The second question:
I am not a dancer, but I love to dance. At times I would like to leap and twirl and stay in the air. But, Osho, I worry about enlightenment. Does an enlightened man dance?
You must have come from a Christian family so you don’t have any idea that enlightened people have been of all kinds. It is a spectrum, the whole rainbow.
There has been Krishna – the dancer, the flute-player, the singer. There has been Chaitanya – a mad dancer, he will dance and dance for hours, until he will fall in ecstasy; the joy will be so overflowing, uncontainable. There has been Jalaluddin Rumi who whirled – he became enlightened while whirling. He whirled for thirty-six hours continuously, non-stop; then he fell, exhausted by the ecstasy, and when he opened his eyes the old man was gone and the new had arrived. It is Jalaluddin Rumi who founded the whirling dervishes and their whole beautiful tradition. There has been Meera in India, who danced to abandon, who danced from one village to another village, covering almost the whole north of India.
But the Christians have only one idea – that of Christ. And they say Christ did not laugh either, what to say about dance? But I don’t believe that that is true. I know him far better than the Polack pope. He was a man of immense joy. He loved to eat, to drink even; he’s the only enlightened one who was not against wine. In fact no enlightened person should be against wine because it is pure vegetarian.
He loved to eat and stay up late in the night eating, talking, gossiping. Christians have the idea that he was only delivering gospels; they have dropped all the gossip. In fact, those gossips contained more truth than the gospels that they have chosen because in his gossips he was really more human. In gospels you become a little inhuman, you become dry. And he was a wet man, not a dry man at all. Can you think of a man who drinks wine and moves with gamblers and prostitutes not gossiping? Impossible!
Narada was one of the great, enlightened persons in India who loved his veena, and played his veena continuously. Kabir loved to dance, sing; Dadu, Nanak were lovers of singing. Nanak always used to have a companion because any time he would start singing, and he needed somebody to play, so he had one continuous companion, his name was Mardana. He was always ready with his instrument to accompany Nanak. In all his travels he had only one companion, Mardana, because he was a master-player. At any moment Nanak would start singing, in the middle of the night, anywhere. Whenever the divine possessed him he would sing, and immediately Mardana would have to play.
There have been people like Buddha who never danced, Lao Tzu, who never danced, Bodhidharma, who never danced. But that does not mean that they were against dancing. My own understanding is that they had found a subtler dance of their inner being; there was no need for a physical dance. They were great dancers in that sense – far greater than Krishna, Chaitanya, Meera, Nanak, Kabir, Dadu because the body was not moving, but their soul was dancing, their very being was in a dance.
So you need not be afraid. You say, “I am not a dancer, but I love to dance. At times I would like to leap and twirl and stay in the air. But, Osho, I worry about enlightenment. Does an enlightened man dance?”
You need not worry – just avoid J. Krishnamurti!

One of my sannyasins, Yoga Suresh, has written:
Recently J. Krishnamurti was talking in Mumbai, and I also attended with a lot of my sannyasin friends. On the very first day, after sitting on the stage, he took one glance at us and then said: “This is not a place of amusement, dance, music, and enjoyment. Therefore, if anybody has come here for joy or something else, he should leave the premises right now.”
He has also mentioned very often in his talks: “All foreigners who come to India are trapped by the so-called Bhagwan, who gives them colored clothes to wear and a necklace of beads or a mala, and he teaches them, the ignorant Western people, to sing and dance to Hollywood music, et cetera, et cetera. And they call it meditation.”
Osho, as you always praise him and his teachings in your lectures, why does he have a grudge against you? He does not even have the courage to say it directly to you by using your name as you use his name. Why is this so?
So, if you are worried about enlightenment, about what will happen, this is the only place where you need not be worried. But you will have to avoid people like J. Krishnamurti. He is too serious, so deadly serious, as if he has the responsibility to transform the whole world. He is carrying the burden, and he is becoming more and more angry every day because nothing is happening. “People still go on dancing, people still go on enjoying music,” he said.
Whenever my sannyasins go to listen to him… And I say, wherever he is, go! Just sit in the front row, and enjoy. Irritate him, annoy him, drive him crazy because I love that man. So I would like you also to love him.
He is a good man, nice, getting a little senile. That’s okay; he is old, we can forgive him. Red clothes just trigger something in him – like a red flag triggers something in a bull. Although he’s an old bull, the moment you flag him with the red, he forgets his age; he becomes young again. And this is good, to bring new blood to the old man – he will live a little longer. Help him! In his past lives he must have been a Spanish bull.
He said, “This is not a place of amusement.” And I say to you that this is a place of amusement, dance, music and enjoyment. To me, life is not seriousness, life is not sadness. He’s too deadly serious, he cannot laugh. Jesus must have laughed, but Krishnamurti? He cannot laugh.
But that too is an aspect, so I don’t say that he is not enlightened, remember. I will never say anything against him because to me enlightenment is a multidimensional phenomenon. He can say things against me, that’s okay because his understanding of enlightenment is one-dimensional, linear. He thinks as if he is the criterion of enlightenment, that if somebody fits exactly with him, just like him, then he is enlightened. But that will simply mean that Jesus is not enlightened, that Buddha is not enlightened, that Krishna is not enlightened, that Zarathustra is not enlightened – because the first thing Zarathustra did as he moved out of the womb, he laughed. Now, that’s what my sannyasins should learn. Next time when you are around, coming out of the mother’s womb, have a good belly laugh. Let that become the sign that an Osho sannyasin is born again!
Zarathustra cannot be enlightened according to Krishnamurti. Lao Tzu cannot be enlightened because he was a very nonserious man. He used to ride on a buffalo, and that too backward – just to make everybody laugh. Just his passing from a town and a crowd will gather and they will start laughing, “What is the matter?”
Only one other master – the Sufi master Mulla Nasruddin – had done that, nobody else in the whole history of humanity. Iran has not been able to produce anybody better, higher, greater than Mulla Nasruddin.

Nasruddin was going to visit a place and his disciples were following him. He was riding on his donkey, sitting backward. A crowd started gathering; the disciples started feeling a little embarrassed, obviously. Nasruddin was enjoying, but the disciples were feeling embarrassed, “What kind of a master have you got? He does not even know how to sit on a donkey! In the first place, he is sitting on a donkey; in the second place, the wrong way.”
Finally one disciple gathered courage and asked, “Mulla, people are laughing and we are feeling embarrassed. What is the reason for your sitting backward on the donkey?”
Mulla said, “A simple reason – the reason is not very complicated.” He said, “If I sit as people usually sit, then my back will be toward you. That will be disrespectful. I love you, I respect you; a real master always respects his disciples.”
A disciple then suggested, “Then we can have some other arrangement: we can walk ahead of you.”
He said, “That is not right because then your back will be toward me – that will be disrespectful toward the master. And if even the master is trying not to be disrespectful toward the disciples, how can the disciples be disrespectful to the master? So this is the only possible way: I am facing you, you are facing me, and the journey is continuing, the donkey is going. Let the fools laugh, but we have our own philosophy and we have to live according to our philosophy.”

Lao Tzu never gave a reason – nobody knows why, but perhaps this was his reason too because his disciples Chuang Tzu, Lieh Tzu, and others, were always following him, and he was making a laughing stock of everybody.
Krishnamurti will not accept Lao Tzu as enlightened and certainly not Chuang Tzu, because Chuang Tzu will look very absurd to him. Chuang Tzu has written such absurd stories – that’s the only reason I love him. He is the most absurd master in the whole world – before me, not after me! I am far more absurd. Even if Chuang Tzu comes here, he will feel a little hesitant whether to enter the Gateless Gate or not.
Krishnamurti never uses anybody’s name: Buddha, Mahavira, Krishna, Christ, Zarathustra, Bodhidharma, Rinzai, Bokuju – he never uses anybody’s name for the simple reason that he is a very one-dimensional man. He thinks he is the only criterion of enlightenment. Hence, he has no grudge against me – just his vision is very limited. His vision is a tunnel vision – perfectly right; through his tunnel he has seen the light, but through a tunnel.
My vision is immense: I can include him, he cannot include me. Hence he says, “Therefore, if anybody has come here for joy or something else, he should leave the premises right now.” Whatsoever he says, never leave those premises! Be the first to enter and be the last to leave. And when he is talking against me, clap, enjoy, laugh. There is no reason why you should not enjoy. Whenever an enlightened person is available, one should enjoy as much as one can, one should eat as much as one can.
And, to me, there is no difficulty. Many times it has been said to me, “You never say anything against Krishnamurti, but he goes on saying things against you.” Of course, he never mentions my name, but indirectly he is saying things against me. He can say, still I don’t think that he has any grudge against me. His tunnel vision is the reason for it.
But this is not only his situation – Mahavira had a tunnel vision, Mohammed had a tunnel vision. In fact, very few people have been able to have multidimensional vision, for the simple reason that when you achieve enlightenment you achieve through a certain path, a certain method, and you become obsessed with it. You think it is the only way. And you are right – it is a way, but not the only way.
I had never had a master in all my past lives, but I had been with many enlightened people. That has made my vision rich. I can understand Jesus as easily as Krishna. I can penetrate the very heart of Mahavira as easily as Buddha because I have followed, accompanied many enlightened people down the ages. And I have never been a follower of anybody; otherwise I would have become obsessed, with a tunnel vision. I have seen Jalaluddin Rumi attaining enlightenment through dancing, and I have seen Gautam Buddha sitting and attaining enlightenment without dancing, and I have seen Krishna with sixteen thousand women – really enjoying Hollywood music!
And it is strange that Krishnamurti should say anything against Hollywood music because he lives in the Hollywood area. In fact, I don’t know what Hollywood music is. He lives in Hollywood; maybe that’s why he has become anti-Hollywood music. It is very difficult to forgive your neighbors.
He says: “All foreigners who come to India are trapped by the so-called Bhagwan.” That is true! You can try and trap them – they are perfectly available. In fact, I send them to Krishnamurti’s meetings. If he can manage to trap them, I make them available. It is he himself who says to them, “…leave the premises right now.” He cannot trap my people; nobody can trap my people because I am not trapping you. I am making you free from all traps.
He says, “He gives them colored clothes…” What is wrong with colored clothes? Just the past life, that Spanish bull life, a hangover.
“…and he gives them a necklace of beads or mala to wear.” What is wrong with it? It is just to irritate people like you, J. Krishnamurti, people who have a tunnel vision. So I put my people exactly at the other end of the tunnel, so whatsoever you can see are only orange people with a mala and my picture.
The moment he sees my picture, he is no longer in his senses. That is the moment when he transcends his mind. That is an opportunity for him to go into meditation; otherwise he is a very rational man, very much tethered to the mind. Whatsoever he goes on saying is just mind stuff. He has transcended the mind, but the way he expresses, he only uses his mind.
I am using many other devices too. I use the mind, I use words, I use silence, I use music – yes, I can even use Hollywood music and make you enlightened through it. That’s how the alchemist functions. This very life has to be used, and all that this life contains.
I can send you to see a “blue movie” and tell you to be just a witness, don’t get identified, and it becomes a meditation. And the blue movie will be the right thing because again and again you will forget to be a witness. And again and again you will have to be a witness. It will be a constant struggle. Just looking at a wall, anybody can become a witness.
Bodhidharma was looking at a wall for nine years. There is no wonder he became enlightened. What else can you do? He must have thought, “It is better now to become enlightened – at least to get rid of this wall.” It is better to project a blue movie on the wall and then be a witness. And I tell you, you will not take nine years, far quicker – you will be tired of all those naked women passing by.
Everything can be used. That’s why I am against renunciation – everything in life can be used. Yes, even wine can be used. You can drink it, but in small quantities in the beginning, and remain alert – just a little quantity and then remain alert. Try to be alert when the wine starts functioning in you. If you can be alert with wine, then go on increasing the dose. One day you can drink the wine just like water and still you are alert. And if you can drink the whole bottle and remain alert, then nobody can make you unenlightened again. Impossible!
This has been used; this is not a new method. This has been used for centuries in India, from the days of the Rig Veda; they called it somras, it is the same. Everything can be used. In fact, the more you have been taught to be against alcohol, against other drugs, the more you have become interested in them. And nobody teaches you how to use these drugs – alcohol, other intoxicants – to become alert, aware.
In a better world, in a more scientific world, every commune should have a small place with experts to give you small doses of intoxicants and help you to remain alert. And if you can remain alert while every possibility is of losing alertness, then in ordinary life you will be alert without any difficulty.
So, just avoid J. Krishnamurti, and that too only till you have become a sannyasin. You are not a sannyasin yet; once you are a sannyasin there is no need to avoid anybody. Go to Krishnamurti, go anywhere. Let them avoid you! This will be a great thing.
He never comes to Pune; he used to come in the past. This is the time, now he should come – now the spring has come to Pune. He used to visit this town when it was dead. Now he should come and I will send five thousand sannyasins and you will see that even an enlightened person dances. Of course, it will not be a very beautiful dance, but he will jump and scream, and hit his head. It will be some sort of dance, a little weird, something like jogging, dynamic meditation. And when he is doing that, put a mala around his neck!

The last question:
Why are Indians so intolerant and so angry at you?
It is very simple: they are very religious people, the only religious people in the world, very spiritual. This is a sign of their spirituality, their religiousness – the so-called religious always become fanatics. They talk about tolerance, but they are very intolerant. In fact, the very idea of becoming tolerant has the seed of intolerance in it.
When somebody says, “Be tolerant,” that simply means there is intolerance. Why be tolerant? I am not tolerant hence I need not be intolerant either. Why should I be tolerant or intolerant? They are two sides of the same coin. But these so-called religious people, these phony spiritualists, are bound to be intolerant because they are repressing their anger, their rage. They are boiling within.
Just the other day I was looking at the newspapers. One article suggests – a very religious person has written the article – that Osho should be given electroshocks. This is Indian culture, religiousness, nonviolence, celibacy, great heritage, the country of the great seers – asking the government to give me electroshocks.
The second article I saw yesterday was that I should be deported immediately. The third article was that the Indian government should throw me into the Arabian Ocean – not even into the Indian Ocean because I may pollute the Indian Ocean. “Throw him in the Arabian Ocean, so if he pollutes, he pollutes the Arabs!”
My suggestion is all these three things can be done together, there is no need to do them separately. First, give me electroshocks; then deport me, and don’t give me a passport, so of course I cannot go outside the country; and because you have deported me, then throw me into the Arabian Ocean. This will save your country, your religion, your culture, your great heritage! This will prove to the world that you are really the gurus of the world, that the whole world needs your advice and your wisdom.
They are angry because I am not supporting their beliefs. They are against me because I am original, and they are always against anything that is original because the original means anti-traditional, anti-conventional. India has lived with borrowed knowledge for centuries…

Chandulal: “Good evening, thought I would drop in and see you about the umbrella you borrowed from me last week.”
Gaurilal: “I’m sorry, but I lent it to a friend of mine. Did you want it?”
Chandulal: “Well, not for myself, but the fellow I borrowed it from says the owner wants it.”

This is the way of the Indian mind – borrowing, borrowing. And the moment they see something new, they become afraid. It is their fear that becomes anger. Remember always, it is fear standing upside down that becomes anger – fear doing a headstand, shirshasan, becomes anger. Anger is just a security because deep down they are feeling afraid.
There is not a single argument against me. Do you think these are arguments against me? Electroshocks, deportation, throwing me into the Arabian Sea. Are these arguments? There is not a single argument. They are feeling very impotent, and out of their impotency great rage is arising.
And they go on, again and again, asking me for many things.

Pandit Lajjashankar Jha has asked two things:
Why are the Indians not allowed to participate in the therapy groups?
Are you brainwashing the innocent Westerners in the therapy groups?
First he wants to know why Indians are not allowed in the therapy groups. Will they understand therapy? Will they understand bringing all their repressed sexuality out? Will they be able to realize and recognize their ugliness? Will they be able to see their original face in the mirror of therapy?
I am perfectly ready to allow them. Pandit Lajjashankar Jha can be allowed, but will he be ready to put his scholarship aside – he is a pandit, a brahmin – will he be able to put his past aside and go into a therapy group? Will he be ready to be really spiritually naked, truthful, honest? A therapy group can function only if you are authentic, if you say only that which you feel. But something else will happen: he will not say what he feels; he will say what is expected of him to say.
Just the other day a sannyasin informed me that an Indian had fallen at her feet and started massaging her feet and saying to her, “Mother, mother,” and then he started taking his hand upward. She stopped him but he would not listen, calling “Mother, Mother!” And he was trying to reach her thighs, and “Mother!” – this dual personality, saying “Mother” and trying to touch her naked body.
Indians are not allowed for the simple reason that they cannot open themselves. They have become the most closed people in the world. If they cannot even understand what I am saying here, how can they go into a really deep therapeutic situation? It will be impossible for them.
And the second question shows his fear already: “Are you brainwashing the Western people, the innocent people in therapy groups?” His fear is there, that if he allows himself and opens up he will be brainwashed. Don’t be afraid, Pundit Lajjashankar Jha because to be brainwashed one thing is absolutely needed – that is a brain! How can I brainwash you? First you will have to have a brain in there, then it can be washed. We will wash it clean, but first it has to be there.
And he calls them, “innocent Western people.” If they are innocent then there is no need to wash them. In fact, you need washing, but you don’t have the brain. They have the brain, but they don’t need washing. You see my troubles?
The Indians are angry with me because they hoped, expected, that I would give more nourishment to their ego; and rather than giving nourishment to their ego I started shattering it to pieces. That’s what is hurting them – I am not fulfilling their expectations.
They will not say it clearly, but every day I see in newspapers. People write to me: “When you were giving discourses on Shrimad Bhagavadgita, it was so beautiful, we enjoyed it so much. When you were talking on Mahavira we loved it. But now, whatsoever you are doing, we hate it!”
Why did they love it when I was talking on the Bhagavad Gita? Because they felt that I am bringing the message of Krishna up to date, I am making it contemporary.
Don’t worry, once the commune is settled I will talk again on the Bhagavad Gita – and you will hate it because then I will tell you the real truth. The last time I was just talking about the circumference of the Bhagavad Gita; now I will expose its reality, its nakedness, and then you will hate me more.
But you are asking about it…

Durga has her first date and comes home at two o’clock at night.
“Where have you been?” the worried mother wants to know.
“Oh, I went to a party with Prem,” she answers.
“And then where did you go?” she wants to know.
“We went to his room,” she says.
“And what did you do there?” worried mum wants to know.
“We had a drink, sat on the bed and talked.”
“Darling, what then?” mum says, jumping up and down.
“Then he asked me to close my eyes, and he undressed me.”
“Darling, and then?” mum is nearly fainting.
“Then he gave me a leotard and a pair of roller skates – and mum, why are you laughing?”

Try to get it! Let me repeat, “Then he gave me a leotard and a pair of roller skates – and mum, why are you laughing?”
The mother is waiting, some hidden expectation that now this is going to happen, now that is going to happen, now this is the last moment and it is going to happen – and suddenly it does not happen.
The Indians have been waiting for me, that I will go around the world spreading the Indian religion and the message of the Vedas. Why should I do all that nonsense? When I can give my own message, why should I give anybody else’s message? The seers of the Vedas were not concerned with me, why should I be concerned with them? They never gave my message, why should I give their message?
But they have a very rotten language of understanding. They can understand only that which is written in their scriptures. They cannot understand anything else. Howsoever rotten it is – and much of it is bound to be rotten; the world has grown, man has come of age…

A man went into a butcher’s shop and asked for half a pound of kidley.
“I beg your pardon?” said the butcher.
“I want half a pound of kidley.”
“Say that again?”
“Half a pound of kidley.”
“Are you sure you don’t mean half a pound of kidney?”
“That’s what I said, diddle I?”

It is a question of language.

Once, a sannyasin asked an Indian in a chai shop for information. He said, “Excuse me, where can I buy some shampoo?”
The chai wallah asked, “You are from which country?”
“Australia,” said the sannyasin.
“America?” queried the Indian.
“Not America – Australia!”
“England? Germany? Oh, yes, Germany people very good. Are you married or single?”
“Not married,” said the swami. “But where can I buy some shampoo?”
“What you want?”
“For what you want this?”
“To wash my balls!” snapped the sannyasin. “What do you think?”
“Oh, oh yes,” he said, “you are a tourist or you are coming for study?”
“I want to buy some shampoo! Do you know where I can buy some?”
“What? What you want?”
“Oh yes, you can buy.”
“But where can I buy it?”
“In shop you can buy!”
“Yes, but which shop?”
“What you want?”
“I want some fucking shampoo!”
“No!” shouted the Indian, standing up, “No fucking here!”

Enough for today.

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