God is always a Gift
Osho on God
OSHO, WHEN SUCH INCREDIBLE HAPPINESS DESCENDS, WHY DO I FEEL SO UNWORTHY?
IT’S natural, because that which descends has nothing to do with your effort. It is a grace, it is a gift from God. And the gift is so big, so huge, so enormous… it is natural to be overwhelmed. It is like a flood, as if the ocean has descended into the dewdrop. How can one feel worthy? You have not earned it. It has nothing to do with your effort, your doing, your practising. It has simply come to you for no reason at all. Hence one feels dumb, lost, in such an awe that breathing stops, that the heart beats no more. The whole world stops.
Whenever it happens to anybody, the same is the experience — the feeling of great unworthiness. But it is beautiful! It will give you a depth in humbleness; slowly, slowly the ego will be eroded. And sooner or later you will find that with your effort, with your worth, only small things are possible.
All great things HAPPEN, they cannot be done — and they happen for no reason at all, remember it. The beauty of the sunset, the song of a bird, a small lonely flower, the moon… there is no reason for it at all. Nobody can answer why it is there: why the rose is so beautiful, and why this existence exists at all, and why the universe moves with such tremendous grace, harmony. There is no reason at all! Hence I say it is a mystery, and it remains a mystery even for those who have gone deeply into it, who have become dissolved into it. It is never demystified.
But you are fortunate, Abhiyana, that those moments have started happening. Don’t be shy to receive them, don’t be embarrassed. It is natural in the beginning to feel unworthy.
Slowly, slowly that grace will transform you. Those moments will come more and more; they will become natural. They will become a shadow to you: where you will be, they will be there. Waking, asleep, you will find that grace surrounding you. That grace will be without and within. That grace will become a luminous point within your heart, and the flame will go on burning.
But remember, don’t become too much worried about your unworthiness. If you become too much worried about your unworthiness those moments will start disappearing, because your focus has changed. Rather than feeling unworthy and becoming focused on it, feel the compassion of God and become focused on it. Remember, these are two different gestalts; both are possible. The unintelligent will become too much concerned about his unworthiness and will start denying those moments: “How can those moments happen when I am so unworthy? It must be my imagination, it must be a trick of the mind. I must be going crazy!” And you will become convinced by your own logic that those moments are not true. You have to prove them untrue because you are so focused on your unworthiness. If they are true, then you are not unworthy.
And your society has been teaching you that you are unworthy. You have been told that you are of no use, you are utterly worthless. You are nothing but dust — dust unto dust. You are more worthless than dirt: that’s what has been told to you in so many ways; it has become a deep rooted idea in you. If you pay too much attention to it, the only possibility is that you will deny those moments. And I know many people who have denied when the mysterious has knocked on their doors, just because they cannot leave the idea of their unworthiness. Then the only possibility is to deny those moments, call them imaginary, hallucinations, dreams, deceptions; something must have gone wrong in your head, you are going berserk; forget all about them because they remind you of your unworthiness. Don’t become focused on it, be focused on the compassion of God.
That’s why all the religions emphasize:
God is compassionate — RAHIM, RAHMAN! — God is compassion. This is just to give you an alternative gestalt so you become focused on His compassion, not on your unworthiness. You may be unworthy — that is irrelevant — but God is compassionate. You may be a sinner — that is irrelevant — God is compassionate. He gives for no reason at all; He is simply a giver, He knows only giving. And He does not give conditionally, He gives unconditionally.
Jesus tells a parable again and again. A rich man called forth a few laborers to work in his garden in the morning. The fruits were becoming ripe and they had to be collected soon. But by the afternoon it was felt that the laborers were not enough; more were needed, so more laborers were called. By the evening it was felt that even those laborers were not enough; a few more were needed, and they were called. And when the third group of laborers went the sun was almost setting.
Then it was night, all the laborers were called, and the rich man gave exactly the same amount to everybody. Those who had come in the morning and those who had come in the afternoon and those who had just come and had not worked at all were also given the same amount of money. Naturally, the people who had been working the whole day in the hot sun complained; they were angry. They said, “This is unjust! These people have just come! They have not done anything at all, and they receive the same amount of money? And a few people have come in the middle of the day, they have done only half the work, and they also receive the same amount of money as we have received? This is unfair!”
The wealthy man laughed and he said, “Answer me one question: is what I have given to you not enough for the labor that you have done?” They said, “It is more than enough, but what about the others?” And the rich man said, “You need not worry about others. I give them not because they have worked, I give them because I have too much to give. I am burdened! Can’t I give my money to anybody, to whomsoever I want to give? Can’t I throw my money to the winds? You have received your worth. You have received because you worked, they are receiving because I have so much to give.”
This is a very strange parable; except for Jesus, nobody has told such a thing. Jesus is saying that those who are working hard, those who are cultivating culture, virtue, character, those who are practising austerities, the doers, they will receive: they will receive according to what they have done. But lovers will also receive, who have not cultivated any virtue, who have not cultivated any austerity, who have simply lived and rejoiced, who have simply prayed, who are not great saints, who may even be known as sinners in the world. They will also receive, and the SAME amount, because God is compassion.
This is something of immense value that Jesus has said. He has opened the doors of grace for people. That’s what is happening to you, Abhiyana — not because you have done anything special to attain it, but because
God has so much He goes on showering on anybody who is receptive. And my work here is to help you to become receptive. My function here is not to teach you how to attain to God, but to teach you how to receive god when He comes. And He comes… and He comes every day, and He comes every moment. You are just not in a receptive mood, hence you go on missing. It is not according to your saintliness that you will receive Him; it is according to your emptiness, receptivity, humbleness. You cannot earn God. It is always a gift, and whenever it comes you will feel unworthy. And it is good to feel unworthy; don’t become focused on it, don’t become obsessed by it. Feeling unworthy, emphasize God’s compassion. Feeling unworthy, see the beauty: that the gift is unconditional, that you cannot claim it yet it has been given to you.
You have heard Jesus’ famous statement: Knock, and the doors shall be opened unto you. Ask, and it shall be given. Seek, and ye shall find. Once Rabiya, a woman Sufi mystic, was passing, and she saw Hassan, another Sufi, praying in the mosque with great fervor, tears rolling down his cheeks, hands raised to the sky. He was crying and weeping and saying to God, “Come, open the door! Let me in!” This was very usual with Hassan, almost an everyday ritual, five times a day. And he was doing it very sincerely. It was not just a ritual, not a mere ritual; his heart was in it. He was a man of great qualities. And Rabiya had heard him many times, and whenever she heard him she smiled, laughed, and went on her way.
But that day she went close to Hassan and shook him. Hassan looked at her, and Rabiya said, “How long are you going to do it? I tell you, the doors are open! You need not ask Him again and again, ‘When will you open the doors?’ Don’t be foolish! Enough is enough! I have heard enough of all this nonsense! The doors are open — just open your eyes and see!” Rabiya’s statement goes far deeper than Jesus’ statement. Jesus says, “Knock, and the doors shall be opened.” Rabiya says, “Open your eyes — the doors are already open!”
And I am saying to you:
God is already coming, God HAS come. He is standing at your doors. Open your doors, open your eyes, just open your heart! And certainly, when God’s energy showers on you, how can you feel you are worthy? Impossible! The gift is so big, as if somebody has given a Kohinoor diamond to a beggar.
He cannot believe it; he will think it must be an artificial thing, or maybe somebody is kidding: “I am a beggar! Who can give me the Kohinoor diamond? Impossible! Maybe I am dreaming, maybe I have gone mad. This is an ordinary stone — I am projecting!”
That’s what happens to everybody when God comes in. But don’t become focused on it, become focused on God’s overflowing energy. God IS overflowing energy, God is overflowing joy! God is SATCHITANANDA — overflowing truth, overflowing consciousness, overflowing bliss. Just whenever you are ready, receptive, it is going to happen. It could have happened at any time; no time was the wrong time, no time was an unripe time. It could not happen for just one single reason: because you were not open. And if you become obsessed with your unworthiness you will become closed again.
It is natural, Abhiyana — but look at the compassion, look at the friendliness of existence. Look at its acceptance of you, whoever you are, wherever you are. It makes no difference between the saints and the sinners. God is available to everybody.
This is an excerpt from the transcript of a public discourse by Osho in Buddha Hall, Shree Rajneesh Ashram, Pune.
Discourse Series: The Guest
Chapter title: Live in the is!
28 April 1979 am in Buddha Hall
Osho has spoken on ‘God, energy, existence, truth, consciousness, compassion, bliss, love, grace, emptiness, humbleness‘ in many of His discourses. More on the subject can be referred to in the following books/discourses:
- The Book of Wisdom
- From Ignorance to Innocence
- From Unconciousness to Consciousness
- The Dhammapada: The Way of the Buddha
- The Messiah
- The New Dawn
- The Rebel
- The Tantra Vision
- Zen: The Path of Paradox
- The Art of Dying
- The Invitation
- The True Sage
- The Discipline of Transcendence, Vol 1, 4
- Sufis: The People of the Path
- And The Flowers Showered